The Unappreciated life from my past!!! (Repost) Originally posted on Jan 2023

My Beautiful Readers...

I would not be around when you read this letter. Don’t get angry at me. I know some of you genuinely cared for me, loved me, and treated me very well. I have no complaints about anyone. It was always with me. I feel a growing gap between my soul and my body. And I have become a monster. I always loved my wife & children very much & I still do. But everyone ridiculed me, for something I had not done.

Finally, this is the only letter I am getting to write.

I loved Science, Technology, Stars, Music, Nature, and above all People. but then I loved people without knowing that people have long since divorced from life. Our feelings are second-hand. I feel that I'm a side dish. Our love is constructed. Our beliefs are coloured. Our originality is valid through artificial art. It has become terribly difficult to love without getting hurt. So in the end love is just a part of your imagination.

The value of a man was reduced to his immediate identity and nearest possibility. To a vote. To a number. To a nothing. Never was a man treated as a mind. As a glorious thing made up of stardust. In every field, in studies, in streets, in politics, and in dying and living.

I am writing this kind of letter for the first time. My first time of a final letter. Forgive me if I fail to make sense.

My life was a fatal accident. I can never recover from my loneliness and depression—the unappreciated life from my past.

I was wrong, all the while, in understanding the world. In understanding love, pain, life, and death. There was no urgency. But I was always rushing. Desperate to start a life. All the while, for some people, life itself is a curse, and I was cursed, cursed for life...

I am not hurt at this moment. I am not sad. I am just empty. Empty & Unconcerned about myself. That’s pathetic. Right ??? And that’s why I am writing this.

People may dub me as a coward, selfish, stupid, a father who has abandoned his family, especially his wife and children, once I am gone. I am not bothered about what I am called. I do believe in life-after-death stories, ghosts, evil, demons, or spirits. If there is anything at all I believe in, is that I believe in God and he will help me as he has always helped me and  I can travel to the stars. And know about the other worlds.

If you, who are reading this letter can do anything for me, my life has always been a roller coaster, particularly the words that were used for me, " WE DONT NEED YOU ANYMORE" rings in my mind day in and day out, she never took them back. But please God forgive them for what most unholy words they used.

Let my funeral be silent and smooth. I don't wanna be buried because I feel the cemetery won't have space for me, so I prefer to be cremated, ash to ash, dust to dust, and blown with the wind. Behave like I just appeared and gone. Do not shed tears for me. Know that some people will be happy that I'm dead than alive.

“From shadows to the stars.”

My beloved Children, I haven't abandoned you, if not in person I will be in spirit. Look at the stars I will shine bright for you both and also for Mama too. for I love you all a lot.

For one last time,

Praise the Lord Jesus Christ

I forgive especially those who have hurt me, and I pray to God to please forgive them and to keep my beloved ones safe from the evil that lingers around.

God Bless Us All...

Jacob M

P.S. Definitely a Very Cold Letter Definitely a Cold Letter... Ciao...