You wanna know what I personally find ridiculous and shit about most married couples?

 You wanna know what I personally find ridiculous and shit about most married couples? 

They expect "love" alone should keep a romantic relationship strong. It's almost like they feel entitled to having their partner be with them forever and be totally fine with whatever type of sexual affection they get (or none at all!) because it's "love" that matters most.

But it's not only love that keeps a strong romantic relationship...

It's also attractive. 

And love and attraction are separate things. 

Attraction leads to desire which leads to sex (or other forms of romantic affection). 

And sex is the only thing that sets you apart as a couple from being friendly roommates. 

So you definitely need both.

And when the attraction is fading, I believe it's important to call it out and be honest with your partner, so that you're both on the same page and you know how to come to a conclusion together.

It just doesn't make sense to stay silent, build resentment and live a miserable life under the same roof. 

I published yesterday's podcast episode on this topic and someone made a comment saying, "They won't be happy to hear you telling them you're not attracted to them". 

... Obviously! lol No one wants to hear that. 

But we need to stop being so delicate and defensive in our communication. Especially with the one person we're supposed to love and support for the rest of our lives! 

Stop worrying about fearing it will make her unhappy and know that hard conversations are what make your relationship end immediately or make them SO much stronger (if you're both willing to put in the work).

The goal is not to make each other happy 24/7.

The goal is to be the best team possible and grow in love and attraction that makes sense with both your goals as a couple.

Sometimes that requires temporary sadness or suffering... which is still way better than a lifetime of individual internal suffering. Don't ya think?

Always say what needs to be said for the strength of your relationship long-term. And come from a place of love when you do it. 

If you need help understanding/learning how to come from a place of love during a sex conflict, apply to work with me. I will teach you one of the most underrated skills and it will make your relationship and sex life so much more enjoyable. It could even save it from falling apart.

Have a Sexy Saturday ;)

Jacob M