**The Ice Cream Debacle...**


It was a sweltering summer afternoon in the small town of Brookville, and the ice cream truck had finally made its daily appearance. The unmistakable jingle echoed down the streets, drawing children, parents, and most importantly, two old men named Frank and Harry.

Frank and Harry had been frenemies for as long as anyone could remember. They argued about everything: whose garden had the best tomatoes, whose lawn was greener, even whose dentures fit better. But today, the stakes were higher—there was only one cone of double-chocolate fudge ice cream left.

The two men locked eyes as they waddled up to the ice cream truck, determination blazing behind their thick bifocals.

“I was here first, Frank,” Harry said, huffing and puffing as he arrived at the truck.

“Like heck you were! I had my eye on that double-chocolate fudge before you even rolled out of your lawn chair,” Frank snapped back.

They stood, squabbling in front of the ice cream truck, while Lester, the ice cream man, stood inside, shaking his head in disbelief. He’d seen arguments, but this? This was turning into a senior showdown of epic proportions.

“Gentlemen, gentlemen!” Lester called out, waving his arms. “There’s plenty of other flavours—why not try the vanilla swirl or the strawberry delight?”

But Frank and Harry wouldn’t hear of it. “Double-chocolate fudge is the only one worth eating!” they shouted in unison.

Lester sighed. He knew there was only one way to handle this escalating situation. “Jacob!” he hollered.

From around the back of the truck emerged Jacob, a bouncer the size of a refrigerator, hired by Lester to keep peace at the truck. He was a man of few words but had the presence of a bear. He slowly walked toward the arguing duo, his stern gaze hidden behind a pair of sunglasses.

Frank and Harry, who were still poking each other’s chests, froze in place. 

“Alright, boys,” Jacob said in his deep, gravelly voice. “You’re gonna settle this like men.”

Frank blinked. “Like men?”

Jacob nodded. “Rock, paper, scissors. Best out of three.”

The two old men exchanged glances. Rock, paper, scissors? To decide the fate of the last double-chocolate fudge cone? But neither of them dared argue with Jacob.

“Fine,” Frank grumbled.

“Let’s get this over with,” Harry muttered.

They squared off, raising their wrinkled fists in front of them, ready for the ultimate showdown.

“One… two… three!” Jacob called.

Frank threw a shaky ‘rock,’ while Harry, after much hesitation, threw ‘scissors.’

Frank let out a triumphant cackle. “Hah! Rock crushes scissors, you old fool!”

Harry’s face turned red, but he kept his cool. “It’s not over yet!”

“One… two… three!” Jacob counted again.

This time, Harry confidently threw ‘rock,’ while Frank, in a moment of panic, threw ‘scissors.’

“Payback’s sweet!” Harry shouted, grinning like a kid who’d just won the lottery.

The tension in the air was thick as they prepared for the final round. Lester watched nervously from the truck, holding the precious cone and kids around the truck had stopped slurping their popsicles just to see who would win.

“One… two… three!”

Frank threw ‘paper,’ and Harry, in a moment of pure senility, threw… ‘thumbs up.’

Jacob tilted his head, confused. “What’s that supposed to be?”

Harry blinked. “Isn’t that how you win?”

Frank erupted in laughter, slapping his knee. “Thumbs up? What are you, running for mayor?”

“That’s not even an option!” Jacob said, crossing his arms

“Well, I think thumbs up should win,” Harry mumbled, embarrassed.

But Jacob had made his decision. He turned to Lester. “Give the cone to Frank.”

Lester handed over the coveted double-chocolate fudge cone to Frank, who clutched it victoriously. “Victory never tasted so sweet!”

Just as Frank was about to take a bite, Harry, still bitter about his ‘thumbs up’ blunder, smacked the bottom of the cone, sending it flying out of Frank’s hand and into the air.

The cone landed squarely on Jacob’s head.

A collective gasp rippled through the crowd as Jacob stood there, ice cream slowly melting down his face, his sunglasses dripping with fudge.

Frank and Harry, for once in their lives, were speechless.

Jacob calmly removed his sunglasses, wiped the ice cream from his eyes, and glared at the two men. Without a word, he reached into the truck and grabbed two vanilla swirl cones.

“You’re both getting vanilla,” he said sternly, shoving the cones into their hands.

Frank and Harry stood there, holding their vanilla swirls, nodding in terrified agreement. They didn’t dare argue. After all, no one messed with Jacob.

As they shuffled away from the truck, licking their vanilla cones in silence, Frank muttered, “You know, vanilla ain’t so bad.”

“Yeah,” Harry agreed. “But next time, I’m bringing my own bouncer.”

Thanks to Lester @Latte's Eat 

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I hope this was hilarious enough!

God Bless Us All...

Jacob M

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